Forgive me Father because I sinned ...

Ok, maybe it's a little bit exaggerated ...

Since I'm a kid, I'm afraid of spiders. Brr ... Hate it. But, I love Spider-man ! I always thought that this super hero was wonderful !

I hate spiders, but I have no problem with all the others insects : an ant is trying to steal my fruit, no problem, I crash it ! A mosquito ? If it is in my room when I want to go to bed, I declare war against it and don't turn my light off before I crash it with something !

A spider ... different. Sometimes I need to call my brother, and if I find a spider in my room at night, I need something like 10 minutes before taking a shoe or something else to crash it (of course, in 10 minutes, my little spider has the time to see me and run away !)

And, I don't know why, since few years, impossible to crash an insect without feeling bad, having remorse ! No kidding !!!

Maybe I took the movie A Bug's Life too seriously, and I'm sure that all the insects around me has a family somewhere, and when the night comes, the bug leaves my house/garden to go back to it family !

For example yesterday !

Beginning of the story : Francis' (Mr Patate) fishes both died. He was "sad" and joked a little bit about a sad ceremony in his bathroom ! Anyway.

Last evening, around 22:00, I take a shower.
I feel something on my arm, look, a fly ! A what ??!! An awful fly ! You know the big black one !
I think I already saw it earlier, in my room ! It was flying around me, it was so irritating to hear it zzzzz zzzzz *bing a fly on the laptop screen* zzzzz zzzzz

Because all the windows are open all day long because of the heat, I thought that my little fly escaped ! No !! It was here !! In my bathroom !

Maybe the fly was hot and needed a little refreshment ? *bing, a fly under the shower*

The fly was trying to fly, impossible. To walk, impossible. I wanted to take my shower, impossible.

I watched the fly during 10 seconds, saying to myself
" - Oh God, the fly is drowning, it's cruel"
I turned off the water and try to take the fly with a tissue to put it somewhere else. The fly was moving, I thought that it was ok, I went back to my shower (it's hard to save the life of a fly with shampoo in your hair and almost in your eyes !!)

End of my shower, I checked on my fly : dead ! Oh no !

I thought (and felt STUPID to think about IT !!) that maybe this fly had a family. What was happening when an insect dies ? Do the others know about it ?


Later, I wrote to Francis on Facebook. I knew we joked about his fishes, so I asked him if he could say a little funeral oration for that little fly I killed ! (well I said to him that I was unable to save it !)
And he did it !
We had a lot of fun !

I think I'm strange ! I should stop to worried about insects ! And so, I should change a number on my bucket list, don't know which one, and put

Stop feeling guilty when I kill a bug !!!!

I mean, some bugs "deserve to die" and others are really important ! For example Ladybug ! Don't kill ladybug ! They are the cops of the gardens, eating the bad midges that are eating your flowers !

Plus, a ladybug is cute !

I should think about it !

Goodnight !

xx