Love or lust

 

One day I will be able to recognize simple lust to real love. 

Maybe Derek, the guy I met the first night in Glasgow was right. How can I be sure to be in love when the guy doesn't even know that I exist.

I had broken heart a million times, always the same, I think it's time to go back to my games, forget that I have a heart, enjoy the moment.

Yes, people around me get married, have kids, yes it stresses me a little bit cuz I hear my parents and grand parents, and family asking 24/7 "when will it be for you", but, that's life. I know one day I'll meet someone good that will love me and that I will love, but, not yet. Not ready for this ! 

Anyway, I feel pretty good today. Maybe because it's almost week-end and so I will see some very good friends (and some people who are more than really important for me) and it's gonna be really really good.

After that, Music Day. And then, Musical Break. A real break from everything.

Musical break cuz I really need a little pause. Still have no job, met people who made me suffer, others who are just playing with me, some hypocrites, so, I need to start again a lot of things to really feel better. Move, forget / unfriend some people. Find a job, here or outside France, whatever. But I need to change all those negative things around me or it's gonna drive me crazy and kill me.